Tennis
by MiSSxMELON
Summary: Dumbledore has sent a few Hogwarts' students to master a Muggle sport, to help with Muggle Studies. Pansy, Draco, Hermione, Ron, and Harry are randomly chosen...and must try to deal with Tennis. R&R!


A/N: Yes this is one of those stories where it makes no sense of where it came from. So shut up and read.

**Tennis**

**By: Helen Li**

**Dedicated to: Miss Chelsey Brownfield, who isn't as good as me in tennis, but hey you're my best friend! Hehe...just kidding...you rock at tennis!**

Five Hogwarts' students were sent to the Muggle world to learn a muggle sport. They weren't allowed to have their wand with them, and they were to be dressed in muggle clothes. Why Dumbledore wanted to do this is not known, except that he put in a request to bring back some lemon drops. But the answer was clear as to what sport as they set foot in muggle England. Tennis.

* * *

"THIS! This, my friend, is a tennis racket." Coach Jules yelled as he shoved a tennis racket into the five's face. The five backed away slowly, a bit intimidated by their 'coach.'

"And I presume that would be a tennis _ball_?" Malfoy drawled as he pointed at the tennis ball. He rolled his eyes and crossed his arms.

"NO SMART REMARKS! NOW ALL OF YOU, ONE WARM UP LAP AROUND THE COURTS! BUT YOU-YOU MR. SMART MOUTH, AN EXTRA FIVE!" Jules barked.

Ron, Harry, and Hermione chuckled as the started off running. Pansy gave Malfoy a sympathetic look and a hug before she started off on her lap.

"I'm going to beat you!" Ron challenged Harry with a grin. He sped up, surpassing Harry.

"Oh I think not." Harry shot back. He ran faster as well, sprinting to catch up with Ron.

"Hey you two! Wait for me!" Hermione protested. _Jeez I'd like to have a wand right about now. _And that wasn't the last time she would wish for her wand.

"Ugh, there's no way I'm running." Pansy rolled her eyes as she walked cautiously, peering at her long, red nails.

About two minutes later Ron and Harry arrived first, although they each complained that the other was second. Then Hermione arrived, panting and glaring at the two boys who had ditched her. And finally, finally Pansy arrived long after all the three Gryffindors had taken a break. Malfoy was still running, however.

"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING, WALKING? DROP DOWN AND GIVE ME TWENTY!" Jules raged.

"Twenty...?" Pansy asked, confused.

"TWENTY PUSH UPS!" Jules roared.

"Is a push up some type of bra?" Pansy asked, even more confused.

As Coach Jules' eyes bulged and his face turned red, Pansy stepped back and gave a weak smile.

"Well let's see your tennis skills!" Jules said, giving up.

Pansy hesitated as she picked up the racket, ready to hit the ball that Jules would feed to her. As the ball came, Pansy picked up her elbows, ready. _This would be SO much easier if I had my wand. Oh and all of my charms and spell books... but hey, this can't be that hard, just hit the ball, right?_

Um, right. The ball came and hit Pansy square in the face, causing her to fall down and hit her head...which meant she became unconscious.

Ron, Harry, and Hermione snickered at Pansy. Malfoy kept running...and running pass Pansy. He shrugged and carried on his pace.

"ALRIGHT YOU THREE. THERE'S NOTHING TO LOOK AT! NOW LINE UP AND GET READY FOR SOME GROUND STROKES!" Jules ordered.

"What are groundstr-"Ron began.

"_JUST GET ON THE BASE LINE_," Jules barked.

"But what's the-"Ron started.

"THE WHITE LINE OVER THERE." Jules pointed out impatiently.

Ron, Harry, and Hermione shrugged as they walked over. Malfoy joined the three after they lined up.

"What...are...we...doing?" Malfoy panted. He was bent over, his hands on his knees.

"We're supposed to run over and jump over that net." Harry lied. Ron and Hermione stifled their laughter and tried to plaster a serious expression.

"Oh like that's hard." Malfoy scoffed.

"Well let's see it." Hermione smirked.

Malfoy glared and ran to the net, he had a great leap and for one second everyone thought he was going to clear it easily. But of course he didn't. He's a wuss, what do you expect? So I'll elaborate on what happened.

Malfoy was leaping quite beautifully until his foot got caught on the net. You could see him turn his head to see what had happened, in slow motion, but he tripped and fell flat on his face. He would have been alright if Jules hadn't hit a ball at him to punish him. Jules had accidentally hit Malfoy in the head with the tennis ball, so as Malfoy was getting up, he fell back down...knocked out.

"Well, there are only three of you measly wimps now." Jules growled. He dragged Malfoy off the court as the three Gryffindors shrugged. It was honestly better without any Slytherins.

"NOW! GROUND STROKES!" Jules began.

Hermione was up first. The ball came...and went. Yes, Hermione completely missed the ball.

"Um, Hermione, I think you're supposed to _swing _the racket." Harry whispered.

"I DID!" Hermione snapped back.

"What he means is, you're supposed to hold onto the handle and swing so that the big part hits the ball." Ron explained.

Hermione glanced down at the racket...she was indeed holding it backwards.

"Oops," Hermione said sheepishly. She walked to the end of the line as Jules counted to twenty to calm himself down.

"LET'S SEE IF YOU'RE ANY BETTER!" Jules thundered. He hit a tennis ball to Harry.

Harry was indeed better; he did actually hit the ball, with the racket. The problem was that the ball sailed far...outside of the court...outside of _all _the courts, into the parking lot, onto a car's windshield.

_Crack! Sirens going off_

"Whoa," Ron breathed.

Harry's eyes widened at the car he had hit as his ears suffered the sound of the car's alarms.

"Here's a tip, AIM FOR THE GREEN SPOTS!" Jules yelled.

Harry quickly walked to the end of the line where Hermione was laughing quite loudly.

"Oh shut up, at least I hit the ball!" Harry retorted.

Now Ron had seen the two try to hit the ball, so he had a general idea of what to do. Well, he knew how to hold his racket and not to swing too hard.

The ball came from Jules' racket and bounced on the hard court. As it rebounded towards Ron, he took a step in and swung his racket. The racket met with the ball, causing the ball to go the other way. Yes, he had done it, he had hit the ball! And the ball...hit the net.

"YEAH! I HIT A GREEN SPOT!" Ron cheered.

Hermione and Harry clapped, until Jules ruined the celebration.

"YOU HAVE TO HIT THE BALL _OVER _THE NET INTO ONE OF _THESE _GREEN SPOTS." Jules pointed where he was standing.

The cheering ceased as the Gryffindors became disappointed.

It was at this point that Pansy became conscious again.

"Ow..." Pansy rubbed her head.

"GET UP AND JOIN THE REST AT THE BASE LINE!" Jules ordered.

"What's the-"Pansy began.

"OVER HERE," the three Gryffindors replied loudly.

"Oh," Pansy replied dumbly. She started to walk over there.

"_GET YOUR RACKET_!" Jules exasperated.

"Oh..." Pansy repeated. She walked back, picked up her racket, and walked to the baseline.

"NOW, HIT A GROUND STROKE!" Jules demanded.

"What's a-"Pansy started.

"Just hit the ball into the green spots over the net." Harry interrupted.

"Yeah, and make sure the _big _part of the racket with the strings hits the ball." Hermione added.

Pansy nodded and turned around. All of the Hogwarts' students were in this together. They had to master this sport and defeat the evil Coach Jules. There was a silent alliance between the two Slytherins and the three Gryffindors to stick together against the muggle world. Well, Malfoy didn't really know about the alliance, he was still unconscious.

This was Pansy's second try. It was better; she didn't get injured at all, but unfortunately Malfoy did. You see, as Pansy was getting ready to hit the ball, Malfoy had gained conscious and was getting up until he was hit in the head again and he fell back down.

"Oh no!" Pansy cried out.

"It's okay, he'll live." Hermione rolled her eyes.

"Unfortunately," Ron muttered.

"WELL, THAT WAS OVER THE NET, _INSIDE _THE TENNIS COURT AREAS, AND CLOSE, BUT STILL OUT. YOU-YOU GIRL HAVE POTENTIAL, YOU MIGHT BE ABLE TO MASTER THE SPORT. BUT THE REST OF YOU! A BUNCH OF WEAKLINGS! NOW LEARN FROM HER!" Jules barked.

The three Gryffindors' eyes widened. They all thought the same thing at once. _How could **she **be better at something than** us**?! Well, besides all that girl stuff. It was just luck! I swear if I had my wand I could easily have done better!_

This was not the last time they wished for their wand.

Pansy smirked and walked to the end of the line, tossing her hair. Hermione 'accidentally' hit Pansy with her racket in the leg.

Pansy glared. She picked up her racket and slammed it in Hermione's back.

"OW!" Hermione yelped. She turned around and narrowed her eyes. Picking up her racket, she slammed it down in Pansy's stomach, knocking the wind out of her.

"WHAT'S GOING ON OVER THERE?! NO FIGHTING! YOU TWO, TEN LAPS AROUND THE OUTSIDE OF THE COURTS!" Jules raged.

Hermione grumbled as she started off. After a few seconds Pansy recovered a bit and was able to get up. Learning from her past experience, she began jogging instead of walking.

"_YOU DON'T NEED TO RUN WITH YOUR RACKET_!" Jules cried out in frustration. Yes, the Hogwarts' students were quite pitiful.

Shortly there were two _clunks_ as the two girls dropped their rackets, picking up their speed. Jules rolled his eyes and turned back to the two Gryffindor boys, Jules' new victims.

It was at this point that Malfoy was getting up, regaining conscious once again. Unfortunately Hermione tripped on a tennis ball, sending the ball to hit Malfoy in the head once again. As Hermione stopped herself from falling down, she went on, oblivious to the fact that she had knocked out Malfoy again.

"ALRIGHT. NOW YOU TWO, YOUR FORM IS HORRIBLE! ("Well he isn't afraid of hurting people's feelings." Ron muttered.) YOU HOLD THE RACKET LIKE THIS!" Jules thus showed the two the correct way of holding the racket. He marched over and gave an example of how to hit the ball.

Within ten minutes, Harry and Ron had passed up Pansy's 'skill.' They had managed to hit a 'ground stroke' over the net and into a green spot. Pansy and Hermione were still jogging quite slowly, bitter that the two boys had gotten quite good at the sport.

"That's better. You two are naturals." Jules said gruffly. "Both of your forehands are strong. Now let's work on your backhand!"

Harry and Ron's faces fell as they were put up to a harder task.

Let's just say their backhands were disastrous. Literally. You see, Malfoy was getting up for the _third _time, after waking up. But Harry had managed to hit the ball directly at Malfoy's head. You'd think his aiming was well, but it was all quite a coincidence. So let's just say Malfoy started another nap.

Soon Pansy and Hermione joined the two boys, dripping with sweat. The two boys scooted away, for they smelled quite a bit. And within another ten minutes, Harry and Ron had whipped their backhand into shape. Although it was horrible and easy to slam back down, their backhand could hit a ball _in_ and over the net. Pansy and Hermione were still working on their forehands, but they were able to hit accurately.

"YOU TWO! YOUR BACKHANDS ARE GETTING AS GOOD AS THEY CAN GET FOR TODAY. KEEP ON PRACTICING AND THEY'LL GET BETTER. I WANT YOU TWO TO WORK ON YOUR VOLLEYING! NOW, YOU GIRLS, (Jules turned towards Pansy and Hermione), GO TO COURT NUMBER TWO (Jules pointed at the court next to them) AND TRY TO KEEP UP A RALLY. IT'LL HELP YOUR FOREHANDS AND BACKHANDS." Jules ordered.

"What's a ra-" Pansy began.

"JUST HIT THE BALL BACK AND FORTH FOR AS LONG AS YOU CAN!" Jules yelled before Pansy could finish.

"Why does he speak so _loudly_?" Ron grumbled.

"NO TALKING!" Jules barked.

Finally Malfoy was able to wake up without being hit back down. He sat up and rubbed his head. There definitely was a huge bump. He glanced over at Ron and Harry, hitting some backhands, and he scooted as far as he could from the court.

"GOOD, YOU'RE AWAKE. NOW GO TO THE BASELINE!" Jules noticed Malfoy.

Before Malfoy could ask what the baseline was, everyone stopped and said it at the same time.

"The white line over there!"

Malfoy pretended he knew exactly what he was doing and walked with his nose in the air to the baseline.

"Uh, you might need the racket." Harry said, trying hard not to laugh.

"I know that, Potty." Malfoy snapped as he walked back to the bench to get his racket.

After he got back to the end of the line, Ron decided this was one sport he could definitely embarrass the Slytherin in.

"Hey Malfoy, try hitting the ball, alright?" Ron sneered.

"I _think _I can manage that." Malfoy shot back.

"Well, then make sure you aim for the green spots _over _the net." Ron retorted.

"Unlike some of us, I _know _how the game works." Malfoy said between gritted teeth.

"Oh really? So what's a forehand?" Ron said innocently. It seemed like what Harry and Ron had just learned, Ron had to smear in Malfoy's face.

"Shut it Weasel, it's your turn." Malfoy was saved by the bell. Or in this case, the evil, yelling coach.

Ron turned around, but was too late. The ball hit Ron in the face, sending him to the ground...and yes, unconscious.

Malfoy snickered which only angered Harry more.

"Well he didn't suffer as many injuries as _you_." Harry said angrily.

"But he's still the same poor Weasel." Malfoy smirked.

That was it, Harry's grip tightened on the handle of the racket. Hermione could see from the court she and Pansy was on. She knew what Harry was about to do. So as she yelled 'No!' in a slow motion sort of way, it was all too late.

The racket hit Malfoy on the cheek, which sent him flying onto the ground. Touching his now reddened cheek, Malfoy knew there would be a bruise. And if he were to have a bruise, so would Harry.

Thus began the 'tennis' fight. It didn't last long, for each blow from the racket pretty much knocked out the other. In the end Malfoy was on the ground, 'sleeping', and Harry was on the ground...bleeding.

"Oh Harry!" Hermione cried at the same time Pansy cried out,

"Oh Draco!"

The two girls ran to the boys as if they were some knight in shining armor when in reality they were two wizards in Nike clothes.

Needless to say, Ron was still out of it. But for the whole time being, what exactly was the coach doing? Well it was sort of hard not to notice, but the coach had been screaming the whole time. His face was actually purple now. And as Pansy and Hermione knelt down by the boys, once Jules stomped all the way over to the other side of the court where the children were, it was then that the Hogwarts' students realized he was there.

"HAVE YOU NOT HEARD A WORD I'VE SAID?!" Jules raged. ("Actually, you don't really _say _words, you yell them." Hermione muttered.) "YOU KNOW WHAT? I DON'T CARE ANYMORE! IT'S OVER, I QUIT BEING A COACH!"

No one complained nor tried to stop Jules from marching out of the courts.

* * *

_The next day..._

"Headmaster, do _not _send any of our students to play any more muggle sports ever again!" Madame Promfey said in a huff to Dumbledore.

"I'll say. They didn't even bring back any lemon drops!" Dumbledore agreed.

A/N: Well this was fun to right since I play tennis. I would have incorporated more, but I think it's good where I left it. It was one of those 'not following the books, just stupidly funny' sort of thing. I hope you liked it, do review! (I'm thinking about adding more sports they try to learn? I don't know, should I?)


End file.
